More People will Not READ my Blog Today, Than I Have Teeth

Congratulations! Well I think they are certainly in order; considering you’ve stumbled upon a true “gem”. A “Diamond in the Rough” amongst all this dithering, drab and dreary nonsense. You’ve now opened yourself to a Whole New World. Unlocking the door to the musings of theMaster of Verbal Sock-Puppetry“. With that kind of opening, I have nowhere to go but down. Shall I begin?

I made an interesting discovery the other week, while starting up this little side-project. (My Blog). To be honest it’s about the only thing going on right now. But, between my wife comforting me, as I weep inconsolably in my son’s closet – and a few wicked mood swings aimed at anyone donning a “Best Buy” polo shirt . . .Let’s just say my days can be pretty full. While perusing the veritable cornucopia of options in distributing my beloved “Rant da Jours”, I found that another individual (in fact several) had come up with very similar pseudonyms (or monickers) for their on screen personas, to that of yours truly. Distressing me further, were the few who’d glommed on to my Brand. GO FIGG’R . Honest mistake, I’m sure, and I have no real plans for legal retribution for copyright infringement, although my Bankruptcy attorney says I have an “air-tight” case. Granted, some of these folks have been allegedly using these names for “years” for various products and services. But, I still think I could get them for a breach of “Intellectual Property”. . .No matter.
One Gentleman in particular stands out most to me in his attempt at putting the “kabosh” on my plans for utter and total control and domination of all things “Cool to be Read”.  While fending off competing offers from Major Syndication Conglomerates, I stumbled innocently enough upon such an egregious and blatant misuse of my Brand. This man uses a blog site called “GO FIGGER”. He also seems to have but one entry, from like 3 years ago. When I saw this travesty, I was, need I say, shocked and appalled. How could a man abuse such an “obviously brilliant and well-thought out ahead of time” name, just to leave it behind? Underutilized and in a shambles? With a total disregard for the fact, and knowing perfectly well, that I was just a few years away from unleashing my Masterpiece? Now I’ve got to rethink the whole clothing line and fragrance collections (for men and women). The video-game development and morning show with Perez are now on the back burner. I mean, this whole thing has set me back months! (Stop and Breathe)
All Seriousness Aside,
If I’m not mistaken I believe this Gentleman goes by the screen name of Chuck G. Now, I liked N.W.A., just as much as the next white-bred, midwestern, mom-lovin, son of a preacher did. . . back in THE DAY. Don’t get me wrong! (Please) But why does a brotha’ have to go double-dippin’ on my coat tails? You had your shot Chuck. This is MY TIME! 
(Excuse Me. . .)
One of my kids just informed me that the Gentleman I was referring to was actually named Chuck D). Yo Chuck! We still Cool?        All right then. There’s somebody out there sneakin’ in on your Brand too! Does this guy have any shame? Chuck G. not Chuck D. I don’t want to get in on that whole East Side-West side thing. I don’t roll like that! I actually don’t roll much at all. Except my socks in little balls, when I do the laundry. 
My point is this. (I think I still have one) You are ALL Welcome! For my Blog  – GO FIGG’R. You’re welcome to read and enjoy at your leisure. But not that leisurely, I’m kind of on a deadline. I’m lookin’ at a place in Malibu and the agent is kind of leaning on me. I will have details on how you can make my dreams happen in the near future! In the meantime . . .
GO FIGG’R!
Peace Out – Later
D A N

Humor


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